announcements + various distractions

This is Dane. Dane is a nice guy. Doesn’t Dane look like a nice guy, peoples?

Now, I won’t show you a picture of me. Cuz I don’t want to ruin anyone’s morning — but just imagine an Asian girl scowling at the camera, gritting her teeth. ROWR!!!

That’s me. Me is not a nice girl. Me don’t look like nice girl, peoples.

Why’s that?

Yesterday I had morphed into the worst LA stereotype EVERRRRR.

…though, now I’m kinda curious to hear what anyone else thinks the worst LA stereotype is…

For me, it’s The Flake.

It’s kinda like The Hulk, except instead of turning green and mean at the first sign of anger, it’s about dropping all hard commitments at the first sign of distraction.

Por ejmplo, “Dude, I’m on my way over to meeting your parents for the first time — oooh, SHINY!”


“Look at the SHINY. How much is the shiny? Where did the shiny come from?”

You get the idea. Like Dory and her Squishy, if you get the movie reference.

Yesterday, I was at home practicing for THIS:

…and kinda getting irritated with myself. 1 — because for some reason, I am having the HARDEST TIME memorizing a 7-minute talk. (With TEDx, they’re pretty strict on sticking to the script, so riffing would probably be a BAD IDEA), 2– because my voice on paper, sounds different from my voice in person, and I felt all fakey-sounding.


A friend/neighbor of mine is reviewing the new Gwyneth Paltrow cookbook and had made her homemade Sriracha sauce and asked if I’d like to come over and taste it. She sounded disappointed that it was actually good.

I knew that I had a commitment that afternoon to log onto Vokle (a crazy, bells-and-whistles version of Skype) for this interview with Nice Guy Photographer Dane Sanders. It was to kinda promote the TEDx talk I’m doing this Thursday and to actually do my part as a speaker for this non-profit event, since I was refusing to really spam people daily about it on our Twitterfeed and blog. Also, it was to talk to Nice Guy Dane Sanders. (YOU CAN CHECK OUT HIS WEBSITE HERE.)

So I get home and on the computer, thinking I have a good 10 minutes before go-time.  And then I see all these emails regarding logging onto Vokle, asking if I was okay, was everything alright, was I in some sort of accident, to not worry, that we’d  just reschedule…

There was an alarm I put in my smart phone to “alarm” me to head on home to get on the computer, but the idiot side of Alice had set the alarm to ring 10 before 5PM, instead of 10 before 4PM.  I don’t know why I thought it was at 5PM EVEN THOUGH IT WAS ACTUALLY AT 4PM.

What a nice guy.

I’d accidentally and obnoxiously stood him up and he’s still so NICE about it.  I sent him an email with a million apologies and he was just SO CHILL about it.

This trips me out.  Not because I was expecting Dane to be a jerk, but because I was expecting anyone to be angry at me for flaking out on an event that was something people had to RSVP and log into for.  It’s like I pulled a Lauryn Hill, except without the star power.

I’ve been publicly chewed out for having done lesser things.  However well-intended those things were.


Gotta admit, though, I’m known to be somewhat of a space cadet, not to far from being Mr. Magoo’s e-strange-d, second cousin, twice (forcibly) removed.  And normally, people just sigh and look at me like it’s cute.


I wonder when I’ll give myself a break for it.  For becoming that LA Flake that I so often judge and deny that I am.  🙂


…I’mma write more about that.  In a later post. On a slightly more serious note, things are still a little fresh, a few transitions we’re going through.  So once things settle a bit more, I’ll fill you in on why you won’t be seeing any napkins on our trucks this week.  And possibly next week.  And possibly the week after that.

But if I’m to give any short heads-up: THIS WEEK, BRING YOUR OWN NAPKINS.

The bizarre shall be explained later.  When I have pictures.  And I get this Tedx talk thing over with and can relax into a puddle of peaceable goo.

AND ONTO THE DISTRACTIONS!!! Why? Cuz sometimes, when things get intense, a short distraction is sometimes more than welcome. Just don’t get sucked into them like I did yesterday. (CELEBRITY COOK BOOKS ARE FASCINATING!!!)


Okay. Okay! Once The Office is done for the season (it’s oddly strange now that it’s Michael-less), I’ll give Parks and Rec another try.

Love, tacos and self-flagellation,


3 Responses to announcements + various distractions

  1. Jessica says:

    Really, seriously we have to bring in our own napkins? I’m wondering about the possible because’s but I’m gonna feel bad for those of us that have the sauce dripping from ur tacos into our hands n not being able to wipe them so we’ll be embarrasing ourselves by licking our fingers. Lol.

  2. Monica says:

    99cent store!

  3. JeanPierre says:

    OMG! no napkins! — Too bad “f!nger l!ck!ng good” is already coined.

    I’ll go with Jessica and the finger licking, THANK you very much!

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