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RANDOM: THINGS I DON’T APPRECIATE

Can you believe I went to bed at 8:45PM last night and didn’t wake up until 7:22AM?  So my mind’s a little gluey, gummy and yogurty at the moment.  Too much sleep.  Blaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrgh!

I’m sure on-call doctors, type-A students and truck managers are all like, “Quitchyer whining/callate, holmes.”  They’re lucky if they get 5 hours or so, if that!  >__<

But there is so much a thing as too much sleep.  Which brings me to one of the things I don’t appreciate…

THINGS I DON’T APPRECIATE

TOO MUCH SLEEP

I know I’ll take some heat for this one.  And it’s completely understandable, since most people don’t get enough of it.  But too much sleep can be bad news bears, people.   When I wake up from more than 8-9 hours, my muscles are exhausted like I’d been running marathons, my head vaguely aches and I just don’t feel generally excited about the day.  In fact, I want to sleep more, since I don’t feel like getting up, but if I do, I know my headache will intensify.  I just get listless and spacey and my mood is geared toward being unproductive for the rest of the day.  ::yawn:: And I yawn every 9 seconds.  It’s like the whole day ahead of me is running on time whereas I’m slumming it in heavy quicksand.

SEDUCTIVE FACES

Do you kinda get the idea of what I’m talking about?  Super fleshy/shapely lips, really prominent noses, high cheekbones, arched eyebrows and the semi-permanent scowl of a man on the prowl etched into the upper half of their faces.  I DON’T KNOW WHY, BUT THEY REALLY BUG ME.

And they’re probably not even bad-looking people.  I mean, they have fans throwing their panties at them for good reason, I’m sure, but for some reason, I just DON’T TRUST THEM.

I realized this when I was about 6/7 and saw Nicolas Cage making a move to passionately kiss Cher, and I was like, “Don’t do it, Cher!!!  Don’t do it!!!  Plus he has a wooden hand, who TRUSTS wooden hands???!”  But she did. Apparently.

And it wasn’t that it was Cher kissing a younger man (MUST WATCH LIST: Kim Sam Soon and What’s Up, Fox?).  It was that it was with NICOLAS CAGE.  Oh, yuck!  (No offense to Nicolas Cage the person, just Nicolas Cage the face.  Think: Face Off.  He should’ve just kept Travolta’s face and run with it.)

Not that I had any business watching Moonstruck when I was 6 or 7, but there ya go.

Now there is a difference between a seductive face and a seductive attitude.  Here’s some examples of men without seductive faces, but pretty seductive attitudes:

Btw, I must tell you that I find Eric Dane to be some kind of holy hybrid crossbreed between Brad Pitt and Clark Gable.

You see the difference, right?

Seductiveness: attitude, I find appealing.  Countenance, I don’t.  Again, not saying that men with seductive faces are bad-looking, I’m just saying that I personally don’t appreciate them.  That’s all.

LONG CONVERSATIONS OVER TEXT MESSAGING

photo courtesy of telegraph.co.uk

You know why this girl is exhausted??  Cuz she somehow got sucked into an existential conversation about why LOST was the more feminine counterpart to Battlestar Galactica and how TV has never quite been as exciting ever since.

LONG CONVERSATIONS OVER TEXTING.  Unless you’re innerested in hittin that — or someone or something, DON’T DO IT.  Or, at the very least, I’m making the plea, DON’T DO IT TO MEEEEE.

Here’s an example of an acceptable conversation over text:
M2: Whachoo doin Sat night?
ALICE: eating leftovers and watching all the Dr. Faraday episodes on LOST.  siiiiigh.  so dreamy!
M2:
ALICE: wanna come over?
M2:

Here’s an example of an unacceptable conversation:
E3: Saw a New Yorker article on Scientology.
ALICE: Cool beans.
E3: It really got me thinking about religion and cult phenomena and how it’s a massive allegory for what’s going on today on a pop cultural level.  Don’t you think?
ALICE: I guess I could see that.
E3: So then it got me thinking about how we, as humans, need to be a lot more conscious and aware of the things we get sucked into.  Popular corporatism is the will of the people these days.  It’s such a shame, really.  Especially with all that advertising on grassroots youtube vloggers.  I mean really.  Don’t you think it’s a shame?
E3: Like in that boingboing article.  I sent it to you yesterday.  You read it, right?
E3: Are you there?
ALICE: brb
E3: This isn’t gchat.
ALICE:

The thing is, I’m actually okay with really long, drawn-out conversations about the possible future state of humankind or getting into long-winded schpiels about quantum energy, ancient aliens, spirits and the expansive collective kaleidoscope of human consciousness.  BUT NOT THROUGH TEXT.

Look, I just don’t like talking with my thumbs.

An actual computer keyboard, I can do.  Over the phone, I can do.  In person, I absoLUTELY can do.

But not through text messages.

Hey, maybe it’s a generational thing.  When I got my first Nokia cell phone, color phones (much less CAMERA PHONES) hadn’t even come out yet, and each text cost you about 30 cents.

Times were simpler back then.  Resources were scarce.  You were trained to text only absolutely vital information that needed to be let known immediately, like, “Not picking up phone. Toilet overflowing. Want me to call plumber?”

Stuff like that.

Also, there were no keyboards, you had to dial through numbers, so you had to keep clicking ‘2’ until you came to letter ‘c’ and if you clicked too far, you had to start all over again at ‘a.’

People of my current generation kind of understand and appreciate this, so even when they send me random sh*t like a funny picture or going to a restaurant that reminded them of me, they keep it brief.  Nothing ever bleeds into a paragraph.

I do notice that the longer texts either come from either kids half a decade younger than me or folks a generation or more older than me.  NEITHER UNDERSTOOD THE SCARCITY.  THE HIGH TEXTING BILLS.  THE CONVERSATIONS WITH YOUR PARENTS.

ALL THEY’VE KNOWN IS ABUNDANCE.

Plus my thumbs are getting tired.  And frustrated.  You know, with hitting all the wrong letters on the keypad/keyboard cuz THAR SO TINY.

Uf!

***************************************************************************

Man, I am long-winded!  But thass why you all love me!  (Or not.)

I know this sounds familiar, but I will post next time about all the things I DO love and appreciate!  Next time!

AND THAR SHALL BE UPDATES.  Like the videos that are still being tediously edited on an amateur scale for Papi Chulo Town and our field trip to Melbourne next month.  Ya-hooooo!!!!

Love and tacos,
Aliiiiiiiiiiiice

0 Responses to RANDOM: THINGS I DON’T APPRECIATE

  1. Sleepyhead says:

    Moonstruck-vintage Nicholas Cage? Oy vey….

  2. tien. says:

    1) Too much sleep sucks more, I think, than too little sleep;

    2) Ewwww I never understood how anyone thought Nicolas Cage was/is good looking;

    3) Johnny Depp is kind of sultry. I might maybe would go straight for him, maybe. At least, the thought would cross my mind. I mean, it has already;

    4) Seductive faces on women: yes.

    tien.

  3. Lua says:

    1. appreciate Honey Sempai
    2. Regret ever telling you about my Nichola Cage crush 🙁
    3. I think your head hurts after you sleep too much cause your a little dehydrated, it always reminds me of a hangover headache.

  4. Dee says:

    I really enjoyed this, laughed through the entire post.

    Anyhow, I agree with everything besides the text conversations. I usually don’t like talking to uninteresting people, so the “oh, I gotta go” is easier done through text than on the phone. LOL

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