In other news, I received a lovely email in my inbox this morning:
Hi , long time no seeing you !
There is good news I want to share . For a long time , I want to buy
a laptop , one that is high quality but low price . This morning I got
my laptop , just one week after I put the order on the site (
www.olcekn0.com ) .
The site has many kinds of electric products , like mobile phones , TV
, Games , and so on . All of the products are original and brand new .
You can see it yourself in your spare time . I believe you won’t
disappoint and get some surprises . The laptop I get is really high
quality and it arrives me so quickly . Hope you can get what you want
on the site , too .
You know, there are times when I don’t even know how to respond to these things. HONESTLY.
“Hi, long time no seeing you”? “HI, LONG TIME NO SEEING YOU???”
What, you wanna rub it in, Jordan Sandler? You know, it’s been three months, two weeks and one day since receiving an email from you and all you can say is “Hi, long time no seeing you”??
And then there you go on and on again about that damn laptop again: “For a long time , I want to buy a laptop , one that is high quality but low price .”
Yeah, I’ve heard that one before. Three months, two weeks and a WHOLE day ago. I’m starting to wonder if this is some strange pick up line you use with random women — and if so, I’m TOTALLY GAME.
You know, I was a little bit disappointed when you didn’t reply to my first, second or eighth email, Jordan Sandler. I was beginning to think you were starting to avoid me.
And they were perfectly friendly emails, IMHO — asking if you were in the LA area, where you grew up, how many brothers and sisters you had, if you were allergic to ferrets, when was the last time you were in a relationship, if he/she broke your heart, if you were on the rebound — and if you were, that I wasn’t interested…and, that, well, I wasn’t interested unless you were interested in maybe one day hoping for more than a rebound relationship. Also, that if you were interested in my life story, that I had a really amazing Facebook profile, replete with family information, education and job history, my favorite books, music, movies and quotes and general inspiration for any future gift ideas.
That I tried looking for you on Facebook, but that there were so many Jordan Sandlers, that I couldn’t figure out which one you were, so I tried to add each and every one of you as my friend on Facebook, but that none of them could recall sending me an email about a quality laptop you were really excited about for getting at such a low, low price!
So I tried searching for you on Twitter, but after coming up bankrupt, I decided to resort to emailing you again.
But you never answered.
You never answered after promising that I “won’t disappoint and get some surprises.”
Well, WHERE ARE THE SURPRISES, JORDAN???
I’m starting to believe that maybe there are no surprises in the game of love and internet romance and that I WILL disappoint. I WILL disappoint, Jordan.
That is, well, was, until I received this email in my inbox this morning.
Thank you, Jordan, thank you! It seems that you’re up to the same ole, same ole and that you want to start fresh and new and again with me. Before, you know, things got a little crazy!
And what is love, anyway, without a little crazy???!!!!111oneone
Love and tacos,